the sky is falling.

Credit Cards Now Accepted! :D

2008-11-11T08:08:00.000+08:00

kids!

we now accept credit cards!
kahit ano pa yan!

come on and get your custom-made jeans at defacto! :D

Update 2008!!! The LOOOOOOOONG DELAY!!!!

2008-05-09T05:34:00.000+08:00

Hi Guys and Gals!! DEFACTO IS ALIVE AND KICKING!!!! sorry if we've been laxed in updating the site, but we assure you that all our efforts have been devoted to bringing you the best fittnig jeans ever..... we'll be posting dozens of new photos, new fits and new designs. We'll be updating the site and we'll be working on events and Collaborations with different artists this year!!! A few minor changes!!!

1.) we've raised the base price to Php 2000/basic pair. Can go higher if designs get more complicated

2.) waiting time is 7-10 days but we'll inform you if it will be ok earlier

3.) Repair warranty is 21 days from fitting

sunflower

2008-01-06T22:51:00.000+08:00

youth.

2007-05-25T01:05:00.000+08:00

this shot was taken during a shooting for bonakid. its my favorite among the other shots i took. :)

deadpan.

2007-01-27T03:16:00.000+08:00

nanood ako ng sine kanina... "stranger than fiction"...
napag-isip din ako... ang hilig ko isipin ang pagkakamatay ko... paano kaya mangyayari yun? sa anong paraan ako ma-chu-chugi? kasya kaya ako sa kahoy na kahon na hindi made-to-order? oo nga pala, ayaw ko nun. segue muna... ang tanong naman talaga... kelan?

sa totoo lang naisip ko na siguro lahat ng mga kailangan gawin sa pagkakamatay ko. na-ikwento ko na siguro sa lahat ng mga kaibigan ko at pati sa nanay ko kung ano gagawin pag ako'y pumanaw... gusto ko ng cremation, gusto ko pula ang lalagyan, black and white yung tiles ng kwarto, tapos lalagyan nila ng disco ball at sasamahan ng disco lights... tapos papatugtugin nila yung "i bet you look good on the dancefloor" playlist ng ipod ko na hindi naman talaga pang-sayaw yung mga kanta... tapos gusto ko lahat naka-black and white, walang red... ako lang ang naka-red... ako lang sa maliit na baul... ako lang ang matingkad... kasi last hurrah ko na yun eh... shet kayo! patay na ako... kung baga... 4 days of fame na yun... wake ko na nga lang di niyo pa ako pag-bigyan.

ang weirdo pero kapag naiisip ko yun natutuwa ako. nakakatuwa para sakin isipin na pumanaw na ako...

dahil ba hindi ako masaya dito? bakit nga ba ako hindi masaya? meron ba talagang mga tao na genuinely masaya? meron naman, pero hindi talaga tumatalab sakin yung klase ng pag-iisip nila... na-iinggit ako... pero natutuwa para sa kanila kasi masaya sila... at iniisip nalang kung kelan ako sasaya... pero tumatagingting parin sa isipan ko na sana mawala nalang ako... gusto kong mawala... pero hindi pwedeng ako mag-initiate nun... baka maraming magalit... hindi pumunta sa wake... at hindi mag-enjoy sa pina-install kong disco ball... paano kaya yun???

so ngayon... sige... tuloy ang buhay... pero hindi parin ako masaya... siguro ganito nalang... hinay hinay sa pag-iisip na hindi ako masaya... tapos baka sumaya ako...

pero pakiramdam ko malabo rin yun...

tignan natin bukas kung gumising ako ng masaya...

kapag walang ilaw... madilim.

2006-10-01T23:42:00.000+08:00

kaya nag-laro nalang sila ng chess by candlelight...

....

2006-09-13T11:21:00.000+08:00

and then you die...

2006-09-12T23:46:00.000+08:00

and then you die
and then you die
and then you die...

mind farting.

2006-08-22T00:01:00.000+08:00

my dog chewy is becoming excessively naughty (he peed in the middle of my room!) and seriously smelly.
long drives are boring when you do it alone. i drove to tagaytay, alone, for the first time. even if i've got my music playing, i couldn't help being mesmerized by the white dashes on the road. seriously hypnotizing, man! total Z fest...
should not drive when car has semi-busted brakes... really scary. especially when alone and sleepy. bad idea.
the area code in tagaytay is 046... and i kept calling the wrong number to order yellow cab.
my super ex-girlfriend. cheesy but fun. i wonder what kind of ex-girlfriend i would be like? take note, wonder, but definitely do not want that to happen. already neurotic as girlfriend... (not proud, just am. trying to turn it down a notch.)
SM North Edsa. The Block. a total renovation. looks a lot like mall of asia. only smaller. but once you step out... it's still SM North Edsa. little dirty kids running around. wish someone would bathe them or something... poor seemingly smelly kiddies.
the devil wears prada. got a sneak peek. the clothes were awesome! drool-worthy. will never be a size two, four, or six. will kill to be a six. hrmmm... weight issues suck. food good! will not sell soul for awesome career.
I really need new boots , man.
KIMCHI. will forever be one of my favorite restaurants. even if it has become quite dingy.
OK GO. awesome band! i love them. thanks jojo for showing me the treadmill dance.
Panic! in the disco... ok rin!
Argh... the long weekend is over.

i couldn't come up with anything better. phooey. shite!!!

favored deviation.

2006-07-30T20:39:00.000+08:00

oddly enough... one of my shots that i posted on my deviant art gallery (its a depressing one, i tell you! hahaha... much like this blog.) has been added as favorite. someone liked my work! and another person actually commented. *pat on the back, pat on the back* and i looked at their galleries... and they were like... REALLY GOOD!! so... *another pat on the back. another pat on the back*

i suddenly have some pride! fried pride, but pride nonetheless.hurray for favoritism!

oh, and i adore the artists on deviant art. i heart all of you. you inspire me.

i am such a dork. *CHEESE*

coconutssssssssssssss...........

--------------

something i stumbled upon:

"What we have to establish here is who is the fucker and who is the fuckee?
I for my part see myself as a fuckeur."

in dire need of a drink.

2006-07-25T22:55:00.000+08:00

it seems that all my attempts of pissing my problems away through alcohol today were all shot down... three attempts... shot down... big time.

i don't drink... its not really my thing to go a-drinking when problems come my way. but today, i really wanted to do what other people did when they had issues that have yet to be settled.

i have shit loads of issues. especially these days. i don't want to go into detail about them, i don't really bear my soul to anyone... even to this silly blog. all i know is... there is seriously something wrong. it might be me. i don't know. i don't even know if i cared enough to find out where all this fury is coming from. yes, i said fury, because the word anger just doesn't cut it.

the little devil in me has been manifesting quite a lot these days. not to everyone around me, but to the person that i seem to care for the most. i say things i don't mean... i say things that burn... like i said, i speak poison... daggers come-a-flying out and i can't seem to stop them. only to find myself regretting being a dumbass... crawling back like a wet dog with its tail behind its legs, puppy dog eyes and all, begging for forgiveness. that may be tactic may be working now, but i dread the day when it loses its charm...

i still want to drink... i must try again. to see what it's like to drown myself in sorrow with an alcoholic beverage in hand. any alcoholic beverage i can find... i don't want to think anymore... these thoughts always seem to lead to wrist-slitting fantasies and watching the blood from my veins make mushroom shaped patterns on the bathroom floor. don't worry, i know i won't do it. i'm not capable of that, i'm sure. and i know that i'm seriously exaggerating my situation... maybe i've just seen way too many depressing flicks in my lifetime. so... i should go back to something a little more feasible... alcohol...

ah yes... i went down the stairs to find that mother dear is not around! alas! a bottle of martini asti in the chiller (sadly, not the cellar. i dont like my alcohol in room temperature)... quite yummy, i must say. i got a glass (seriously, a whole glass, i'm that jologs...) and filled 'er up! i'm feelin' a slight buzz. the photo to your left is the glass, that was once filled. yeah... practicing photography, even while self-pity mode is turned on. drown sorrow drown...

the legazpi place.

2006-07-21T17:10:00.000+08:00

the deserted and forgotten building in front of our office. it's such a fugly sight! and i dont think they will ever finish it. it's quite a shame because it's a really tall building and it was already half done when they stopped construction. its located at a pretty good spot in makati! i sure wouldn't mind living there... (but not in the state that it's currently in though...)

the not so fab-five.

2006-07-20T15:43:00.000+08:00

nah! they're all still very fabulous! i took these photos for a stint carl gave me as "photographer" at "the Fab 5 in Ayala Malls" press junket. i didn't have the proper equipment needed for such event... but no use feeling bad. i love my camera! I HEART YOU 30D AND KIT LENS AND 50MM... I HUG YOU THREE!! back to the silly photographs... these images were cropped from the wider shots that were taken.

snippet.

2006-07-18T22:51:00.000+08:00

tatzkiboy: may pumasok na pusa sa bahay tapos na freakout yung rabbit!! ayaw nang lumabas ng cage!!
tanya: awwwwww... kawawa naman si playboy
tatzkiboy: WELL he pisses on his water and drinks it! hahaha...
tatzkiboy: but hes a cute bunny!!

put a sock in it.

2006-07-18T00:34:00.000+08:00

i just found the motherload of socks while searching for the box of my lomo colorsplash flash... i didn't find what i was looking for... but i found what i needed. LOTS AND LOTS OF SOCKS! i found TEN new pairs of socks in my mom's closet. (there were ties too!) she bought the said socks in hong kong last year and forgot about them... i found them, and now their mine, all mine!!! *evil laughter*

i have become sick and tired of wearing raggedy old socks man... and some (ok fine... majority!) of my socks are either worn out or have holes in them. and there are times when i actually wear socks that dont match because the other half of them have holes... i dont want to wear socks with holes. so between wearing socks with holes or socks that dont match, which one do you think i would choose?! and then there was this one time when i went to fuzion with socks that didnt match... i couldnt take the embarrassment of taking my shoes of and declaring to all of mankind that my socks didnt match (i must tell you... they dont stink! they just didnt match!)

the joy of a new batch of socks... in silly different colors and sizes (can you see them goofy looking golf socks?! I LOVE THEM!)... i'm a happy bunny, man! SOCKS!!!

------------

on another note. tats and i met up at greenhills promenade. we went to EGG and played tekken. i realized that i am soooooooo competitive! to the extent that i would say things that i didnt mean when i start losing... eep! i'm a sore loser... Thank God he didn't take anything i said seriously. i turn really mean in such situations. i hate losing! even if it is just tekken. arghhh...

maybe i should polish up on my pseudo-tekken skills... nahhhh!!! i'm not really into the gaming thing. i know i'm bound to lose anyway. i should practice keeping my mouth shut during moments like those... i think i may have been harsh... I SPEAK POISON...

The US vs. John Lennon

2006-07-16T22:06:00.000+08:00

a must see documentary!
check out the trailer.

it was just so sparkly!

2006-07-11T23:59:00.000+08:00

that title sounds so very "white chicks"!

anyway... i've always wanted to take a photo of that thing, when greenbelt was all shiny and new... it was really a wonder to me during that time. i mean, putting chandeliers in the cinema area? astounding! And yes, i am this shallow! until now i think that greenbelt is still a pretty pretty sight. except for all the construction work thats happening right now. although i'm quite curious as to what they're building and what it'll look like and what it is that their going to put in there. come on! the ayala center in makati has practically everything! what else is there to add?! duplicates of the stores that they already have?! what's coming?! WHAT?!

on another note, i love the segafredo spin iced coffee. it was fantabulous! heaven in a big plastic cup. it was like a javanilla shake from seattle's best mixed with the ultimate espresso from coffee bean and tea leaf. and the price wasn't half bad! :) love love loved it! and it was nice getting to hang out after work... especially after yesterday! AHHHH!! yesterday really made my head hurt. when i got to my bed... shet... it felt like i fell into a coma or something because i was so exhausted... and on a monday at that! what a way to start the week man...

i just can't wait for friday. FRIDAY!!! SATURDAY!!!

Pirates of the Carribean II... hurray! it's onnnnnnn!!!

hinge.

2006-07-10T14:18:00.000+08:00

do i really have to put a backgrounder on this one? i would much rather not. kawawang butiki.

pipes & sewers.

2006-07-10T00:43:00.000+08:00

it seems that i've become way too attached to taking snapshots of people. so today, i brought my camera around and tried my luck at taking photographs of inanimate objects to see what i'd be able to come up with. i went to shangri-la and went snapping away. most of the stuff i took were crap. i really have to learn to make "timpla" those damn settings properly.

anyway, enough about my frustrations. caption caption: the first one was taken in the parking lot. the next was in a bathroom stall, see the toilet? :)

salcedo street blues.

2006-07-08T13:14:00.000+08:00

one year (and a day ago)...

2006-07-06T00:36:00.000+08:00

PARE...

jamming with Dahon.

2006-07-04T08:38:00.000+08:00

ahhh... yes... yet another batch of band photos. but don't call me a mofo-ing groupie. i shall keel you... nor am i a band-aid... i just umm... have nothing better to do. and i love being around tats. so that's it pancit.

and yes... i am a girl of few words... not a man. i am a girl! (i think!)

Scenes from Fete De La Musique 2006.

2006-07-02T14:41:00.000+08:00

the other photos are over here... here... here...
(*note: last two photos were taken by tats. :D )

terminal dysfunctions.

2006-07-01T12:49:00.000+08:00

these photos were taken at around 3:30AM while we were still at fete de la musique at the mall of asia. we were snacking at mcdonald's when we saw this taxi and fx terminal right up front. no one was around that area. it was pretty cool i tell yah... :D that's why we got all... err... snapshot crazy. hehehe! here are a few of the photos that were taken that i happened to like a lot.

Dahon.

2006-06-29T14:08:00.000+08:00

guilt is a buzzkill.

2006-06-19T10:19:00.000+08:00

stop it tanz. stop thinking about it. stop continually blaming yourself for everything. let it go. don't be too hard on yourself.
but i can't. i can't. its the way i was built. its how my mind works.
then change how your mind works.
but that's how my f*cking mind works...
doesn't mean that you can't change it, you bludgering idiot. you don't even want to try.
yeah i do want to try... but i give up easily.
then don't give up easily.
easy for you to say.
easy for me?! idiot... do you even realize that you're having a conversation with yourself right now?! i am you... silly girl!
oh shit! you're me and i'm you?! damn... i've crossed the line.
no you haven't. you just need to talk.
i do?! i talk...
no you don't. not about the important stuff.
but what is important anyway?
do you really want to broadcast it?!
not really... i should keep this vague.
good girl!
good girl?!?!?! noooooo... i'm not. and that's the sad part.
yes you are.
no i'm not.
stop it! ok fine... you're like... borderline good girl/bad girl.
oh my God! you are so baduy!
do i really have to tell you who i am again?!
oh... oh yeah. i'm baduy. yeah.
ok. good. now that that's all cleared up. let's go back to the subject.
huh?! what subject?!
Gadamit!!! even you're conversations with yourself are malabo.
i know.

Get Born!

2006-06-15T14:17:00.000+08:00

i'm sure you're hoping waiting wishing for the aging process to suddenly just stop for you... but sadly, no. i can see that you're aging. you are old. hahaha! or rather older... but i love you nonetheless!! happy birthday pi-bop! :D

(anyway... i'm just kidding! you look like a million bucks!)

pairalin ang kabaduyan.

2006-06-13T14:25:00.000+08:00

hahaha! we had our hair cut by the same stylist... :P can you see the similarity? probably not.. but whatever! it's our second time to look like an anime couple... not that it was intentional. i guess those are just the types of hairstyles that toni & guy does... whatever! their okay haircuts... but i still wish i had the other stylist, the one i had the last hair cut with, do my hair. she would've made it even more fabulous. and tats thinks that richard, his stylist, would've done a better job. But no use thinking about it now...

i want chocosnaps... i'm bored... where are my glasses?! hrmmm... i want to learn how to properly set my camera for second curtain flashing thingies... ahhh... and louis is a pixelpeeper. hahaha!

rubadub at corik's.

2006-06-13T11:16:00.000+08:00

photo frenzy... here are a few of my fave photos from that night. the others i posted on my multiply. because flickr is such a bee-atch.

neglected.

2006-06-08T19:26:00.000+08:00

hindi ko naman sinasadya na gawin yun sayo. ni hindi ko nga masyado namalayan na ganon na pala ang lagay. hindi na ako studiante o di kaya isang tinatawag na "bum" para makatambay lang kasama mo palagi. nakahanap na ako ng trabaho... at yung trabaho na yun kinakain ang oras ko... ang oras na sana naibigay ko sayo. at kung hindi man trabaho... kailangan ko pa hintayin si ma at pa para maka-uwi... kasi totoo... tamad ako mag-commute. isipin mo naman. ang dami dami kong bag na bitbit araw araw... hindi ko kayang kargahin sa FX-MRT-Jeep yun... mabigat na... nakaka-takot pang manakawan. maarte na kung maarte, pero ganon talaga ako. pero wag ka mag-alala... ngayon nalaman ko na ang kondisyon mo at mga nararamdaman mo tungo sa akin... gagawa talaga ako ng paraan para makasama ka. mabigyan ka ng tinatawag na "quality time". alam ko naman na ang dami ko nang utang sayo... hindi ko na nagagawa yung mga ginagawa ko kasama mo noon. na tumambay lang at tumanga sa harap ng TV... habang hinahawak hawakan ang buhok mo... kinikiliti-kiliti ka sa tiyan... at ang tabihan ka pag matutulog ka na. wag ka mag-alala... aayusin natin toh... siguro kinailangan lang na gisingin ako sa ganitong klaseng katotohanan... na nakakaramdam ka pala ng ganong klasing mga emosyon... kasi eh! sana sinabi mo nalang... para naayos natin ito ng maaga... para hindi na tayo umabot sa ganito... wag ka na kasi ma-depress... mahal naman kita eh... sobra! hindi ko talaga sinasadya...
pramis... mahal kita... kung pwede ko lang ibalik ang dati chewy...

(my mom called me... she brought chewy to the vet because he's been having some skin problems... the vet said that he's depressed... and that the owner a.k.a me, probably had been neglecting him. i feel really really bad. anak ko yun eh...)

tribe.

2006-06-08T11:31:00.000+08:00

captions?! nah.....

lomo-fying adformatix.

2006-06-06T16:29:00.000+08:00

took photos of my officemates. then i used a PS script to make them look like lomo photographs. coolness! (at least i think so.)

i posted the other photos here.

trying stuff out.

2006-06-04T22:44:00.000+08:00

i got a new camera. hurray! been dreaming about it for quite some time. i'm so in love, i swear! :D
anyway. its been too long since i last posted stuff... i thought i'd post some portraits i took. at least my favorite ones.

the others i posted at my multiply account. hihihi!

zipideedoodah! happiness is...

2006-05-07T22:56:00.000+08:00

a new pair of chuck taylors! the chucks that i've been ogling for at shoe salon for quite a while now. Hurray!! i finally own them!! dreams do come true! i feel so happy. chucks make me happy. i heart chucks. *kisses new shoes*

Eureka! Caffeine works on me!

2006-05-06T04:06:00.000+08:00

i honest-to-God-ly thought it didn't... yet here i am... wide awake at 4AM. is it the iced coffee i drank 3 hours ago or is it just me insomniac-ing again? hrmmm... i remember waking up at 7 this morning. i should be exhausted by now. So... why am i still awake?! hrmmmm...

my favorite silly person.

2006-05-06T02:24:00.000+08:00

i ♥ tats.
(i know he'll keeeeeellll me for posting this.... i'm sorry!! and another thing, the gig photos i took were seriously unworthy of posting. hahaha!)

since i can't smoke...

2006-05-04T16:42:00.000+08:00

yes... it has been three and half hours since my last cig. i know that it hasn't been that long, but it takes shit loads of willpower not to join my officemates when they run down to have a drag. and it seems to be getting harder now because talking about it makes me want it some more.... ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! i musn't give in... i probably will later. i hate having asthma. the weekend is just around the corner and i must get well!!

i therefore wasted my time creating (could this even be considered a creation?) this. trying out the 70's rock poster thing. i believe i failed miserably.

ayan ka nanaman.

2006-05-04T11:18:00.000+08:00

i've been getting this response since last week. i've been rather PMS-y lately... complaining, nitpicking, experiencing extreme moodswings, psychotic outbursts, breathing fire... some of the things that i sincerely don't want to be accustomed to. it's just that these days i've been sensitive about practically everything. just so many things seem to be nakaka-badtrip. the weather, my job, how slow the hours seem to pass, how its not friday yet, how its not saturday yet, how my dog smells funny, how my favorite pair of jeans haven't been washed yet, how i don't have a vacation getaway set, how the sun seems to suddenly have a grudge on me constantly reminding me that he does exist, how i still haven't finished the book that i've been reading when its supposed to be such an easy read, how i lack monetary funds to buy the things i want (not need, want), how tom cruise's wacko-ness drove me to read about scientology and silent birth (i just really found these concepts quite creepy), how i didn't really watch silent hill because tats kept closing my eyes shut because he thinks its too gross for me to see (although i am a bit grateful, because at least i'm able to sleep without nightmares)... things that i shouldn't be nutty about, but am. and quickly realizing that these are shallow things to get hyped up about. shite.

-------------
and now, i'll be posting these photos just because i can. :)

i can't post.

2006-04-28T17:19:00.000+08:00

because pia is reading this while i type. i need time to think...

gising na.

2006-04-25T22:33:00.000+08:00

"do you have the time to listen to me whine about nothing and everything all at once?"

basketcase. every single morning... billie joe armstrong sings me this to wake me up... or at least try to. for the past 9 months... this song has been my alarm clock tune. and it seems that billie joe has lost his touch in getting me up and at 'em in the morning. the past couple of weeks... i don't even hear him anymore. wa epek na siya. i just wake up when my body tells me to. (hahaha! f*ck... my body talks to me!) but then i won't blame billie joe's incompetence or my yaya forgetting to wake me up (more than once, anyway) regarding this matter. i still am just not used to waking up early. i need discipline. i must wake up earlier. i guess one factor that i'm blaming is the lack of work on my part... i haven't gotten a new job order for like 3 weeks. i only had what people would refer to as "pa-petiks-petiks" of JOs for 2 weeks already i think. and i really am starting to feel useless (yet again). i need stuff to work on or i will die of boredom. i have no drive to go to the office early when i know that nothing awaits me when i get there.

I NEED MORE WORK. and i know you're gonna say that i'm gonna regret saying that. but right now... I NEED IT!

-------------
anyway. billie joe armstrong still rocks. but i might try changing my alarms now since his waking up prowess has lost it's touch. i wonder what song i'll use... think think think...

-------------
anaconda is a stupid stupid movie. and angelina jolie's dad is a sucky actor. i haven't seen any good movies that he's starred in. but his daughter is hella pretty.

-------------
pia starts working tomorrow. i must harass her. how to harass pia...
silly college photo. :D thesis days. was always tired then. hence my droopy eyes.

--------------
random nothing. a silly parking attendant dude said something to me in spanish. hahahaha!!! it was kind of weird because it's not on a daily basis that i come across parking attendants who hits me in spanish.

and it's not a normal occurence for me to get hit on anyway. HAHAHA!

market ko talaga... MMDA (hahaha!! it's quite handy when i get asked to pull over)... security guards... janitors... firemen... septic tank cleaners... PANALO!

--------------
mr. hanky just died on south park. Rest In Peace Mr. Hanky.

i want a tattoo...

2006-04-18T17:17:00.000+08:00

seriously. i so want one... even if a friend says that it feels like "like a blade cutting ur flesh in rapid succession".

scary... but thrilling. i want one. what design to get though... *wonders*

--------------------
randomness...

silly photo i took at 3am in the morning while he was playing the guitar in the mezzanine of our house in tagaytay. i just thought it was nice. :D

coffee accident.

2006-04-11T22:15:00.000+08:00

under a starless, even cloudless night sky... without reason... with a party with talented musicians jamming in the background enjoying themselves... i found myself contemplating about how i haven't achieved anything in the 21 years of my stay in this strange little blue planet. despite what other people might say, i haven't done anything remarkable or at the least memorable enough for me to remember when i'm fucking old and wrinkled. what did i do when i was 21? i say... NOTHING!! i haven't honed any skills... everything that i told myself that i would do or at least try to learn i haven't done... it's all stuck in my non-existent list of things to do but haven't done yet because i'm a procrastinator. and have i resigned myself to that fact? i don't know... seemingly... but i don't want to stay that way... i can't believe i sat around for hours last night... cigarette after cigarette... thinking... thinking... envying everyone for everything they have that i don't! seeing people that i admire so much... people that i will never be... i just had to go out for coffee...

dragging tats along with me... i wanted to go to a starbucks spot that we haven't been to before. i needed to just sit down and allow myself to wallow in self pity for a little while longer. sipping the little piece of heaven that can only be bought in starbucks, a coffee frappuccino light blended (without the guilt, yo!). ashcreek center in ortigas was the starbucks of choice that night. as the night grew darker and as we just sat there (with me wallowing... tats trying to make me happy... not failing miserably... but still not getting the reaction that he's been trying to get) a car speeds through ortigas avenue... you can hear him coming without even seeing him... screeeeeeeeeeeech... bang... crash... the tires must have hit the side of the island... lost control... went up on the island... hit a lamp post... and careened on to the other side of the highway. for a moment, as cliche as this sounds, it felt as if time had stopped. Damn! did someone die?! suddenly... tats jumped off his seat to go see what had happened... me being curious myself... i just had to follow.

shattered glass all over the asphalt avenue... a smashed car suddenly surrounded by strangers checking if everyone inside was okay... in moments people who had gone towards the car and those who tried to help had their own versions of the story. of course, the human side of me just had to know what they had to say. one said the person in the passenger seat died... another was talking about a bashed head of sorts... people in the coffee shop were talking about trying to go CSI over what had just happened. whatever the score was... i couldn't get myself to come close to see what the score really was. we tried to go nearer... but i just couldn't get myself to get that close to the accident. i sat by the steps in the building near the accident... smoked yet another stick of winston lights... and watched as the police came and took the people inside the car to the nearest hospital... as spectators and other folks who had tried to help, get on back to their personal business...

it's remarkable how everything happened so fast. and the timing was just... it just... it felt like a sign. me contemplating about my useless worthless life... then someone out of nowhere suddenly lets himself go and getting himself into a really bad car accident right in front of me. i mean... doesn't that say something?! it was like a quick butt slap from God. telling me to stop loathing and wallowing in self pity. that if i want something... if i really do want to achieve and do what i want to do... then i should stop sitting around and dreaming about it.

i guess i'll just have to see what happens.

and yes. i am a cheeseball. thank you very much. :P

note to self: stop wallowing in self pity. silly girl. *slap slap*

chuck's thoughts on boredom.

2006-04-06T22:33:00.000+08:00

As soon as we become boring we die. Never ever become boring.
-- Invisible Monsters, Chuck Palahniuk

just something to ponder about. ahhh... palahniuk... you are a smart smart man.
i want to write some more... but i have a lazy arse and i've got an early day tomorrow. so... my thoughts will remain in my greymatter for the meanwhile.

shooting tomorrow. do hope it ends early. (i'm writing in fragments, i am lazy, i must change, will try, swear!)

for a lack of things to blog about.

2006-04-05T17:38:00.000+08:00

i took a silly quiz...

Your Stripper Song Is

Closer by Nine Inch Nails

"You let me violate you, you let me desecrate you
You let me penetrate you, you let me complicate you
Help me I broke apart my insides, help me I�ve got no
Soul to tell"

When you dance, it's a little scary - and a lot sexy.

What Song Should You Strip To?

HAHAHA!!! crazy...

random.

2006-04-04T14:21:00.000+08:00

i love this poster. wish i could have it...

don't call him that.

2006-04-04T11:22:00.000+08:00

last night, i was browsing around through rubadub's photos at multiply... since i started to really like their music and plus tats plays for them occasionally. looking around, looking around. and it seems that everytime i see a photo with tats in the photo, he's referred to as "MR. BOY BASTOS". i wondered why... has he done anything or does he have a reputation of being bastos? i don't really mind... if it's like a joke that they've been throwing around. so out of my curiosity, at 12AM... i called tats to ask why... and he didn't know!! poor guy... he didn't seem too happy to be called "MR. BOY BASTOS"... he told me he didn't get it... why would they call him that. the answer? how the hell should i know... :P

FOOT-IN-MOUTH

2006-04-02T11:56:00.000+08:00

happiness. giddy feelings and butterflies. silly grins and puppy dog eyes. chemical reactions brought about by love. and all those loveydovey crap you hear.

it has happened. the disease pia has dubbed me to have. i have contracted... the FOOT-IN-MOUTH disease. i admit it. i'm a hypocrite. majority of the rules and "notes to self" that i have set regarding relationships have all been flushed down the mighty mighty drain. but it seems that i don't care. i don't think i have ever been this happy.

yesterday, if viewed from another person's point of view, may be labeled as mundane and even downright boring. sobrang simpleng saturday lang tsong, but i consider it as one of the finer moments of our relationship.

a quick rundown of events:

in comes tats. brought ingredients for caldereta. left ingredients in the kitchen. went upstairs to watch saturday night live. downstairs for a smoke. start preparing for the caldereta. boil beef. cut veggies up. put in the other stuff (sorry... didn't really pay much attention to the details of the whole thing) ah basta! cooked caldereta for 3 hours! watched TV while doing so. went for smokes. cook. cook. cook. went out to watch ICE AGE 2 and coffee. walked around shangri-la. went home. ate the caldereta. watched television again, saturday night live again. DVD player conks out. forced to watch James Bond (Pierce and Sean versions) on star movies. smokes. watch more tv. accidentally falls asleep. wakes up. realize its morning. panic a little. half awake, i stare at him while he's sleeping. get up. eat breakfast. run.

those are the moments that seem so "wala lang". but those are the types of things that i find myself looking forward to all week.

if i were the old me, and i read this post. i probably would've went "BLEH!!!". i actually still do that... but hey! FOOT-IN-MOUTH seems to be popular nowadays.

*note: the caldereta was fabulous. i ate so much!!! fabulous i tell you! fabulous! the boy knows his cooking!

green. grin

2006-03-24T14:09:00.000+08:00

a fresh blog... just because everyone else seems to be doing it again. joining the bandwagon? let's see if this one will last... hrmm... kaya ako di nag-writer eh... this blog will be filled with the nothingness that is my life... nyahahahaha!!! this is bound to be uninteresting...